It’s Always About People.

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I have a few sayings that you may have heard if you’ve ever worked with me for a while.

People may be part of the problem, but they’re ALWAYS part of the solution.

and

Closed mouths don’t get fed.

Both of these relate to communication and interpersonal dealings. They both came to mind this morning because of a recent email.

Do you ever open an email and feel your heart rate increase? Get that pinched feeling?

As a self-employed business owner, I work with a lot of individuals that have different needs, varied personalities and unique communication styles. I pride myself in being flexible and versatile.

BUT.

There’s one that unintentionally pushes my buttons. The desire for perfection comes across as nit-picky. The lack of interest in learning collaborative technologies leads to rework. The brusque manner feels cold and judgmental. The emails sound… not nice.

Do you have anyone like that in your life? How do you work with them?

Even though I’ve been tutoring and teaching and coaching others in some capacity since 2001, I’m no where near done learning. In fact, I really believe in that Einstein quote,

once you stop learning, you start dying

So here’s what I’m going to work on – and I’d love to hear your input too – whether it’s advice for me, or your own story that you’d like to share so we can hold each other accountable.

  1. Assume good intent.
  2. Try reading the email to myself in a positive tone of voice.
  3. Remind myself that everyone has external pressures and I have no idea what they may be dealing with at the moment.
  4. Think on it, and if I still feel compelled to follow up a day later, collect my thoughts and schedule time to talk about it.
  5. Forgive myself. I also have other things going on, and sometimes a particular email may hit me the wrong way at the moment, but that doesn’t mean there’s anything actually problematic with the interaction.

I truly believe that people come to work to do the right thing 99.99% of the time, so if it doesn’t feel that way, maybe it’s time to look at the process, systems, resources and external circumstances. Here’s to working better, together!

All my best,

Stacey